before baby sister came along and spoiled everything
it was just me and mama and daddy around the supper table
mama would cook up some beans
daddy would work the cotton fields
don’t tell nobody
but I’d probably be out exploring the forest down behind the barn
Getting Better
I walked the trails at Paris Mountain State Park for a number of years, starting back in 2001 after I left my career, trying to out-run the anxiety that plagued me, trying to find some peace of mind out in nature. Some of those walks lasted over four hours, up and down wooded hillsides and mountainsides, alongside creeks, around lakes. And I admit I did occasionally find some peace there. I also found some things that triggered old memories of war trauma.
Read MoreMy Three Friends
Sometimes the trauma of war or the trauma of life can lead to a dark place. If the mind is weak, as it often is, that dark place may beckon to you in perverse but appealing ways. In a day-to-day life where anxiety is hell and depression is heaven, slipping into the darkness, where nothing matters at all, seems as natural as a puppy's wagging tail.
Read MoreLaunching Pad Angst
and so I dream
and so I procrastinate
and so I piddle around
with potential plans
waiting for a sign
Billy cat and Clemson kitty
Billy cat has been a house cat a long time, ever since my brother-in-law rescued him many years ago. Since that time, the closest thing to being outside was when he was in the Florida room-style back porch with some of the windows opened. Out there, Billy cat could sniff the air, hear the birds chirping, watch the neighborhood cats as they strolled by, or annoy the neighbor’s dog when he was let out to do his business.
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